Hurtful moments

This does not seem simple,
I wanna walk away from you,
But it seems no direction
I miss you... I want you...
So badly... Cant you hear my cries?
I want you.. i need you so badly...
this moment is too painful for me..
i wish death comes by..
but im still breathing..
for the sake of that moment..
will return...
i'll live in this pain..
if this pain promises a beautiful tomorrow...

A thousand years, a thousand more, 

A thousand times a million doors to eternity 

I may have lived a thousand lives, a thousand times And endless turning stairway climbs 

To a tower of souls 

If it takes another thousand years, a thousand wars, 

The towers rise to numberless floors in space

I could shed another million tears, a million breaths,

A million names but only one truth to face

A million roads, a million fears

A million suns, ten million years of uncertainty 

I could speak a million lies, a million songs,

A million rights, a million wrongs in this balance of time

But if there was a single truth, a single light

A single thought, a singular touch of grace

Then following this single point , this single flame,

The single haunted memory of your face 

I still love you 

I still want you

A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselves 

Like galaxies in my head

I may be numberless, I may be innocent 

I may know many things, I may be ignorant 

Or I could ride with kings and conquer many lands

Or win this world at cards and let it slip my hands 

I could be cannon food, destroyed a thousand times 

Reborn as fortune's child to judge another's crimes 

Or wear this pilgrim's cloak, or be a common thief 

I've kept this single faith, I have but one belief

 I still love you 
I still want you A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselves 
Like galaxies in my head On and on the mysteries unwind themselves 
Eternities still unsaid 
'Til you love me

If it was meant to be tears, then why there was laughters.
If it was meant to be far, even after being together...  why do you seem to be a stranger?

Just the trust i had that you will never walk away from your words, has broken.
The truthfulness of my heart can feel the crying of every single vein.

Why do I still feel the burning sensation of my love?
Why do still running myself to touch every single torn and hurt myself?


You know what hurts me? what suffocating my breaths?
The way you be like a friendly stranger.. a stranger that I wanna hug and kiss..


Why do i have to cry like my love is a bloody sin? Is it a sin? Is it? I am blind-folded with my dreams,
of being with you.

Should i move away? or to stay and wait for the worst?
Why I am in the situation, that I can't even remember the days , that have gone by. 

What mistake I did that I am being punished, to tremble myself, thinking of you? 


A mere torture I gift to myself .

A birthday should always be a joyous occasion,

Family and friends; obvious invasion.

Duplicate gifts, you don’t even like,

If you complain, might get a strike.

One simple day, placed on display,

Carefully observed, for signs of decay.

Dishonest smiles, they don’t mingle in truth,

As if you were the only, losing your youth.

At such a wise age, everything seems so clear,

Excuse to celebrate, they all came for beer.

Deep down inside, you know that they care,

Your Zoo is unique, normal is rare.

Everyone says that earth going to end in 2012, exact date 22 Dec 2012! Dude, 3 days before X-mas? That's so crazy !! Honestly I don't who to trust? Ya obviously!  some people is saying YES & some is saying NO!! TENSION!!TENSION!! There's a question in my heart a secret one 'sssshhhh',is GOD that cruel? NOPE!! He is not, was never and will never be CRUEL!
I have read this some where, it says that the earth will only end when all the humans want to live, they don't want to DIE. Its different situation in today's world. Everyone wanna die and less wanna live. FUNNY PEEPS~!! I'm not blaming them but the situation of today's world is like that! No door to escape !! Thats what they say !! LOL!! Infact ME,MYSELF was a victim of this evil thoughts *sigh*.

*DANCE TIME* BRB~

I am crazy,not very the innocence, I do what my heart says, I break hearts..  It says that what I suppose to be..  so what? I am happy.. If you have complaints, I cant change my life for you..  Sorry !! Well, I have stop believing in people, trusting new people? That's now thousand miles away stories...  I believe only me and in what I can do. People criticize me, i wont fight back, i'll take it in the most professional way.I am a future celebrity man, cant behave so cheap right? #I meant it for real....  


To be continued....